From Toile to Tranquility: A Mother's Redecorating Journey
A series: Redecorating After the Kids Leave
A series on empty-nest kid’s room redecorating:
It occurred to me that we moms put a lot of care into our homes and in particular that first baby room we decorated ourselves. Then, kids get older and it’s too babyish for them, or we move, or both. So, as I am redoing my twin’s room for the fourth time in twenty three years I realized it’s kind of a moment. It is a moment.
I am not redecorating their room for them. How weird! In a way I am because one of the twins doesn’t live in the area and stays with us when she is here. You might say, “why make it another bedroom? You can do anything with that space? It’s nice space, why make it into a bedroom no one really uses?” Well, fine. Yes, you’d have a point. But.
You know that feeling when someone else has cleaned your home and it looks better than you can make it look? I think if I went to your home I could achieve that, but somehow not in my own home. Imagine having a room that always looked like that when you walked by? Always perfect? No teenagers ferociously crapping it up? Sneakers, undies, stinky t-shirts oozing out of their space? That’s what I am after. Perfection in decor, accessories and neatness. Nothing but the best for my fantom guests in my kids’ ghost room, perfectly neat and decorated.
In the beginning
When our kids move out they generally leave behind a “well loved” (gross) room. They didn’t start that way, did they? Noooo. Remember your kid’s first room?
To start the series I will begin at the beginning. The best baby room ever (we all love our own best, don’t we?).
Our twin’s room was a vision in cute (see above).
I went to the decorator’s building and picked out Brunschwig and Fils wallpaper and matching fabric for valance boxes in “Bunny Business” a toile in cerise pink of little dressed up bunnies in victorian wear doing things people do. Then, I got a remnant from a carpet store, an emerald green and white wilton and got it bound. The chair was off the showroom floor at Scalemandre in a luxurious cotton knob fabric (that is now back in their room after being at my mom’s for about eighteen years and waiting to find out what it will get recovered in). The crib sheets were from Schweitzer Linen in the heart (Lovable 21) pattern. We could have crib bumpers then and these were thick, plus a dust ruffle, bottom sheet and a baby pillow). We had Cadillac sized cream white cribs and a cheap bureau that I painted white and found cute handles for. Mom did the wall papering.
Then we moved:
When the kids were five and seven we moved and I did their rooms fitting for their ages. It was post 2008 crash and the canopy beds were 50% off, I had to have them for the girls. I only got around to doing a canopy for one bed, in the youngest’s room. The pretty striped carpet is a classic that my grandmother used, so I copied her. The paper doll art above the fire place was my aunt’s when she was little that my mom had reframed. The wall paper was pricey but I only needed to cover to the chair rail and painted below that. It’s cheaper and smart. I used white dust ruffles and the same duvets as I had in their baby room, pink and white floral. By the time I took these photos we had aged up to Pottery Barn Kids “fun” sheets.
Middle School
When they entered middle school the twins begged for a redo because all of their friends had badgered their moms into a redo so they wanted one too. Down came the Sister Parish “Dolly” wallpaper in pink and the Clarence House in yellow with tiny flowers and white polka dots that had been my Grandmother’s and in came the white Ikea Malm and gray and white carpet with turquoise accents (barf). A moment in decorating sadness. The irony is that they recently said “why did you let us get rid of the wall paper?” Oh. I had a choice?
Time marches on:
It’s weird. Now I am that mom whose kids are gone. This room isn’t going to remain a museum to a time that has come and gone. Nothing that was will be ever again. And. That’s. OK. That means they are grown up (ish).
If your kids don’t live in the same city as you do that means (momentary heart race) they will return to the room sometimes! Does that mean you leave their room decorated as it was when they left for college or whatever after high school? It seems to work that way in the movies. But, I have always thought that is not only creepy, but a waste of space. We live in the city so space is at a premium.
BUT, I also don’t want to turn their rooms into a gym or a studio. I want their space to be an exercise in decorating that they will enjoy or at the very least, I will enjoy seeing every time I walk past the room. A perfectly neat, pretty space.
Stay tuned…I think I am onto something here…so far I am about $900 into a temporary installation. Head boards and bed frames: $500. Antique baskets, $100 or so, tiny lamp shades for the sconces, $100, ripping up the rug and getting rid of the furniture $200 (task rabbit!).
Lots to think about:
Should I keep the twin beds so I can make them into a king? Carpet the floors again? Paint them? Refinish them? Paint the room a color? Curtains? What fabric for the little couch and chair?
NEXT TIME:
I will show you the inspiration behind what I am planning to do.
MEET ME IN THE COMMENTS
Have you redecorated your kids’ rooms?
Can I see your kids’ first room?
Did it break your heart or give you energy?
Were you thinking of grandchildren when you did it? Be honest.
What did you do? Share photos?
Remember when we used to get lots of home Magazines and rip out inspiring pages? I make a point of ordering those magazines or going to my local drugstore that has them because without that kind of inspiration it’s hard to envision what you might want and what’s out there. What do you think?
My kids have the two BEST ROOMS in our house. Both upstairs. Our "master bedroom" barely has room for our bed and two dressers. In other words, I can't WAIT to turn one of the upstairs bedrooms into my own work, nap, yoga space. But we've only been here 10 years ... might feel differently in another 10.